On this episode of Senseless, Sherry and Melissa begin with a health update and talk about the peace that comes with acceptance and being gentle on yourself. They discuss the power of positive self-talk and self-compassion, especially in times of flare-ups, and they share their experiences of coping with anxiety and depression during their darkest periods. Sherry and Melissa also touch on feelings of isolation when their physical symptoms become too much, and explain how they look inward to soothe the part of themselves that’s overwhelmed by pain and discomfort.

Next, our hosts chat about whether their sensory loss appears within their dreams, and how their dreams have changed over time as their hearing and vision have shifted. Sherry goes into a recurring dream she has involving an extremely steep hill while driving, and Melissa helps her uncover what it might mean in relation to her waking life. They talk about paying attention to the messages your subconscious is trying to tell you, and conclude the show with some calming breathing exercises.

This podcast is not psychotherapy and does not contain medical advice, but is simply a recording of two friends talking.

Episode Highlights:

• Sherry is still experiencing numbness in her arm, and is coming to a place of accepting it rather than hoping it will go away
• Recent bloodwork showed that she has several active viruses, including Epstein-Barr Virus, Mononucleosis, Cytomegalovirus, and several influenzas
• Melissa also had a flare-up since the last recording, but is using supportive self-talk to cope and get through it
• Positive self-talk and self-compassion, especially during flare-ups and times of anxiety and depression
• Divinity wants to experience being in human form
• During flare-ups, Melissa’s hearing goes way down and her tinnitus becomes intolerable
• They love all feelings, including anger as it shakes things up
• Living through flare-ups can be isolating, and holding the belief that you are not alone, whether that be through the presence of divinity in your body or simply by acknowledging your feelings and talking to them, can help the experience feel less lonely
• You can comfort and soothe that part of yourself that’s overwhelmed by the pain and discomfort
• Ask yourself, “How would I soothe a child who was experiencing this?” And do that for yourself
• Melissa can usually hear in her dreams, but she still has dreams where she can’t hear someone or they are speaking too softly to hear
• Sherry does not typically see in her dreams
• She shares her recurring dream involving an extremely steep hill while driving, and Melissa helps her get to the bottom of what that might mean for her waking life
• Melissa became very interested in lucid dreaming after a depressing experience with vision problems in her 20s 
• Paying attention to what your subconscious is telling you
• Guided breathing exercises

Quotes:

“I just have a lot of inflammation. And I have a lot of viruses. A lot of active, active - I'm not contagious, but I have active viruses that my body cannot control.”

“That must be part of what the autoimmune stuff is - when our body’s got such a high viral load that it can't handle it all.”

“I remember laying on the ground...I was being so stoic and just kept going and going and going. And I do remember, my kids were little when this was happening. And I remember throwing myself on the ground and I was just in a ball. And I was just kind of screaming, kind of wailing - because it's a big deal to lose a sense.”

“It ends up being a thing where you have to really go within and...somehow getting to that place of love and compassion, and being gentle with yourself.”

“It's so hard to be in...