In every deep relationship, there comes a point where we are asked to give up something of ourselves or change in ways we never anticipated. Who will this make me? What will this love cost? Tembi Locke fell in love with an Italian chef named Saro when she was studying abroad in Italy during college. Their romance was a story for the big screen. (Quite literally. One starring Zoe Saldana.)

A rare illness upended it all. Tembi spent ten years as Saro’s caregiver before he died. In her grief, Tembi took their young daughter back to Sicily to see what of her husband she could find there—in his culture, in his food, and with his family.

In this conversation, Kate and Tembi discuss:

• becoming the architect of your life

• the effects of long-term caregiving (both the beauty and the cost)

• who grief makes us

If you liked this episode, you’ll also love:

• Katherine and Jay Wolf on what caregiving costs us

• Thomas Lynch on how we become who we miss

• John Swinton on living at the speed of love

Watch clips from this conversation, read the full transcript, and access discussion questions by clicking here or visiting katebowler.com/podcasts.

Follow Kate on Instagram, Facebook, or X (formerly known as Twitter)—@katecbowler. Links to social pages and more available at linktr.ee/katecbowler.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What if you started thinking really concretely about small, hard choices? That’s exactly what palliative care physicians do every day. They help us think about what we really want—knowing that we have limited time and limited resources. You’re going to love our guest today, Dr. Kathryn Mannix, palliative care physician and cognitive behavioral therapist. She offers practical steps to help people and their loved ones make sense of what limited choices they have, navigate any pain and fear they may experience, and gives the most comforting speech on what the end of a life looks like that we’ve ever heard. (I promise this is not scary at all. It is perfect.)

In this conversation, Kate and Kathryn discuss:

• Why we want to keep a lid on the scary things of life

• What even is palliative care

• How palliative care-type thinking can help us live better

• What happens to hope when facing end of life

This is a masterclass in walking right up to the edge with people, in the most gentle, compassionate way.

If you liked this episode, you’ll also love:

• Sunita Puri on living in uncertainty

• Rev. Tom Long on the importance of the rituals for death and dying

Watch clips from this conversation, read the full transcript, and access discussion questions by clicking here or visiting katebowler.com/podcasts.

Follow Kate on Instagram, Facebook, or X (formerly known as Twitter)—@katecbowler. Links to social pages and more available at linktr.ee/katecbowler.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sometimes you really need someone to believe that you are good. Unshakably good. Over 30 years ago, Father Greg Boyle started working with gang members in Los Angeles through Homeboy Industries. The lessons that he learns from whom he calls “homies” are contagious. Every day, they teach him about what it means to heal, to belong to one another, to practice compassion, and to relearn how to feel good again to God and others. These are just some of the transcendent truths that he has to share with us today.

In this conversation, Kate and Greg discuss:

• what it means to see unshakable goodness in others

• what it would mean for our carceral system if we sought to heal instead of punish

• how can we have a greater capacity for joy

If you liked this episode, you’ll also love:

• Bryan Stevenson on rethinking what “justice” means

• Francis Collins on treating people kindly and with love

• Nicholas Kristof on hope as a muscle

Watch clips from this conversation, read the full transcript, and access discussion questions by clicking here or visiting katebowler.com/podcasts.

Follow Kate on Instagram, Facebook, or X (formerly known as Twitter)—@katecbowler. Links to social pages and more available at linktr.ee/katecbowler.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.