WHAT HAPPENED TO MY MIND?

Dealing with Grief’s Physical Side Effects

Descriptions of the many ways grief impacts your body and mind are

not always easy to find. This chapter covers some of the most common—

and

strange—effects of grief and offers tools to help support and nourish your

body

and mind as you navigate the new landscape of life after loss.

HOW (AND WHY) TO STAY ALIVE

Using tools to reduce your suffering is one of the few concrete actions

to take inside grief. Reducing suffering still leaves you with pain, however,

and

that pain can be immense.

Surviving early grief is a massive effort. Forget getting through the day;

sometimes the pain is so excruciating, the most you can aim for is getting

through the next few minutes. In this chapter, we review tools to help you

bear

the pain you’re in, what to do when that pain is too much, and we explore

why

kindness to self is the most necessary—and most difficult—medicine.

YOU CAN’T SOLVE GRIEF, BUT YOU

DON’T HAVE TO SUFFER

Living inside grief, you know there is nothing to be fixed: this can’t be

made right. While most grief support (and well-meaning friends and

family)

encourages you to move through the pain, that’s simply the wrong

approach.

The way to live inside of grief is not by removing pain, but by doing what

we can to reduce suffering. Knowing the difference between pain and

suffering

can help you understand what things can be changed and what things

simply

need your love and attention.