Parents often wonder why I notice things about their child that they don’t. In this episode, I explain why that happens (hint: it’s not because you’re failing), and I share a simple Jedi-inspired exercise that helps you start noticing the subtle signs of safety, stress, and connection in your child.

What you’ll learn in this episode:

• Why kids act differently with me than with you.

• How to reframe the “messy” behaviours you see at home.

• A 5-minute noticing exercise that gives you surprising insights.

• How tuning in with your heart, not your head, builds connection.

Links and Resources:

• Explore the Making Sense of Anxious Children course: huddlewisdom.com

• Follow me on Instagram: @huddle_wisdom_parenting

If you’ve ever been told to “just stay calm” or “be consistent” but no one actually showed you how to do that in the middle of your child’s meltdown, this episode is for you. Child psychiatrist Dr Davin Tan unpacks why simplistic advice leaves so many parents of anxious and neurodivergent kids feeling like they’re not enough.

We talk about how chasing perfection can burn you out, why perfection doesn’t actually exist, and how embracing the courage to be imperfect can transform the way you connect with your child. You’ll get real-life strategies you can actually use during those emotional storms, even on your worst parenting days.

In this episode you’ll hear:
• Why generic parenting advice often backfires
• How perfectionism quietly fuels exhaustion and guilt
• What the courage to be imperfect looks like in real life
• Practical ways to support anxious kids in the heat of the moment
• Why repairing after a blow-up matters more than never losing it in the first place

Who it’s for:
Parents and caregivers raising anxious, sensitive or neurodivergent children who want something more useful than a motivational quote.

Keywords:
parenting anxious kids, parenting neurodivergent kids, perfectionism in parenting, how to support an anxious child, good enough parenting, helping kids through meltdowns, emotional regulation in children, parental burnout, child psychiatrist tips

This episode also features a short clip from the film Anger Management (2003) starring Adam Sandler and Jack Nicholson, used here for commentary and educational purposes.

Listen now and find out how to parent with presence instead of perfection.

LINK to Resource: www.huddlewisdom.com 🎧👍👍👍

In this episode, Dr. Davin Tan helps parents understand what to do when their child is having a meltdown. He explains why our typical response, "calm down," is not only ineffective but can also make things worse.

Dr. Tan makes the powerful connection between a body overheating in a heatwave and a child's nervous system going into full activation. In this state, the rational part of their brain is offline, so telling them to "calm down" is like telling someone to "cool down" when they can't.

The goal isn't to make their feelings disappear; it's to help them feel safe and understood. Dr. Tan shares five powerful, research-backed phrases to use instead, turning a moment of chaos into a chance for connection and learning.

Five Phrases to Try:

• "Looks like that really got to you."

• "Take your time. I'm here."

• "This feels intense, huh?"

• "This is tough. Want to sit with me for a bit?"

• "We'll figure this out together."

Remember: They're not giving you a hard time; they're having a hard time. By responding with empathy, you can help build your child's resilience and strengthen your bond.

Find out more here!

www.huddlewisdom.com