In the second installment of the "Communication Lies Leaders Believe" series, Tammy J. Bond tackles a myth that keeps countless leaders "stuck": the lie that giving direct feedback makes you mean. Tammy powerfully argues that direct feedback doesn't make you mean—it makes you a manager. This episode is a call to courage for every leader who has let their discomfort drive silence. Tammy shares how this avoidance leads to resentment and underperformance and provides a practical framework, the SBIE model (Situation, Behavior, Impact, Expectation), for delivering feedback that is both direct and human. You are not mean for saying what needs to be said; you're managing with intention.

• Mean vs. Managing: Giving direct feedback is a core function of leadership, not an act of meanness.

• The Cost of Silence: Your discomfort with conflict is more costly than the conflict itself. Silence leads to confusion, resentment, and underperformance.

• Courage is Clarity's Best Friend: It takes courage to bring clarity into the workplace. You must be willing to be uncomfortable for the sake of your team's success.

• Separate the Do from the Who: Use a framework like the SBIE model to focus feedback on the specific behavior ("the do") rather than the person's identity or personality ("the who").

• Feedback as a Gift: Embrace the perspective that direct, clear feedback is a valuable opportunity for growth, not something to be feared.

• The Problem with Over-Parenting: Leaders who avoid difficult conversations often fall into the trap of being a "friend" or "accidental therapist," which undermines their ability to lead effectively.

• Managing with Intention: Recognize that your words have purpose. You're not just speaking—you're managing, mentoring, and empowering your team to be their best.

• Why the lie that direct feedback is mean keeps leaders from being effective.

• How to use the SBIE (Situation, Behavior, Impact, Expectation) model to deliver clear, actionable feedback.

• The psychological reasons behind our avoidance of tough conversations.

• The negative consequences of a leader's silence on team morale and performance.

• How to build a culture where direct, kind feedback is a normal and valued part of your team's success.

Great leaders don’t wait for permission to lead, learn, and leverage. If this episode spoke to you, you're ready to get intentional. Join the waitlist for our next Leadership Sandbox mastermind group, starting in September, and surround yourself with people who will call you up to be greater.

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Welcome to the start of our SIX PART SERIES, "Communication Lies Leaders Believe." In this episode, Tammy J. Bond tackles a common and costly workplace myth: the idea that an employee who says they're "overwhelmed" simply needs more support. Tammy reveals: when a direct report can't articulate their workload, they're not overwhelmed—they're underperforming and avoiding accountability.

Tammy provides a practical, no-nonsense strategy to get to the root of the problem. She introduces the "Squeeze Technique," a method to transform excuses into ownership. It's about providing the clarity, structure, and accountability people need to succeed. Tammy challenges leaders to stop avoiding tough conversations and start leading with clear expectations, because overwhelmed does not equal accountability.

• Overwhelmed is the New Excuse: Recognize that "overwhelmed" is often used as a blanket statement to avoid accountability. It's up to you to dig deeper.

• The Squeeze Technique: Apply this strategy to press for specifics when an employee claims to be overwhelmed. Ask for details on their daily tasks, resources, and time management.

• Stop Babysitting: Your job isn't to put on a magic cape and solve their problems. It's to provide the clarity, tools, and accountability for them to solve it themselves.

• Avoidance vs. Support: Don't confuse avoiding a hard conversation with "keeping the peace." Your avoidance is actually enabling learned helplessness and resentment.

• Victim Mindset: The victim narrative ("I can't do it all") must be transformed into a framework of personal ownership and responsibility.

• The Power of Documentation: Use frequent, short meetings and follow-up emails to document expectations and deliverables. This serves as a foundation for accountability or necessary escalation.

• Ownership through Reflection: Flip an employee's excuses by asking them to reflect on their role in the situation, turning their focus from external factors to internal responsibility.

• How to identify when an employee is underperforming versus truly overwhelmed.

• The "Squeeze Technique" to get specifics and expose lack of follow-through.

• Why avoiding difficult conversations about performance leads to resentment and drama.

• Practical steps for setting clear expectations and daily check-ins to foster accountability.

• How to use documentation to support your leadership decisions and escalation processes.

• Listen to the full six-part series: "Communication Lies Leaders Believe." bondgroupenterprises.com/podcast

• Join the waitlist for our next Leadership Sandbox Mastermind groups, starting in September, to get the support you need to lead with bold clarity and stop operating on lies. Sign up today: leadershipsandbox.com/groups

Are you struggling to build the vibrant culture you want because you're still clinging to old habits? In this episode of the Leadership Sandbox, Tammy J. Bond directly challenges leaders to stop "babysitting dysfunction" and confront the "pink elephant" in the room. Tammy argues that you can't build a bold new future by dragging around yesterday's playbook. Culture doesn't change by decree; it changes by disruption.

This episode is a call to action for leaders to stop over-analyzing their culture like a crime scene and start renovating it for the future. Tammy provides a clear-eyed look at how complacency, old habits, and the fear of stepping outside the status quo can create the very dysfunction you say you want to escape. Learn how to boldly break old rules, expose toxic behaviors (regardless of who is responsible), and build a culture of clarity, creativity, and grit. It's time to stop feeding the beast and start leading the change you want to see.

Key Takeaways for Leaders:

• Babysitting Dysfunction: Recognize when you're not leading culture change, but instead maintaining dysfunction by clinging to old habits.

• The Power of Disruption: Understand that change happens when you disrupt what makes unhealthy behaviors comfortable and normal.

• Your Leadership, Your Culture: Be aware that the culture you allow to exist is the culture you are actively leading.

• Legacy vs. Leadership: Stop maintaining the status quo for job protection and start embracing the bold, creative work of true leadership.

• Ask the Right Questions: Shift your focus by asking, "What kind of behaviors does our future demand?" instead of dwelling on the past.

• Break One Rule: Challenge yourself to break one rule of your old culture this week that no longer serves your team's future.

• Titles Don't Matter: Gain the courage to address toxic behavior regardless of who is perpetrating it, remembering that people and productivity matter most.

• Mindset is Everything: Stop over-analyzing your culture like a crime scene and start approaching it as a renovation project for the future.

In This Episode, You'll Learn:

• How to identify and stop "feeding the beast" of old, toxic habits.

• The critical difference between "culture change" and "culture cosplay."

• Strategies for shifting your team's energy from complacent to creative.

• Why your courage to be different is the single most important factor in cultural transformation.

• How to use a "list of rules" audit to expose and eliminate old, unhelpful practices.

Call to Action:
Culture change is hard, and you don't have to do it alone. If this episode hit a nerve (in the best way!), you're ready to take the next step. Join the waitlist for our next mastermind group, starting in September, to help you transform your leadership and build the team and culture you've been dreaming of.

Join the waitlist now: leadershipsandbox.com/groups