In this episode, Kimberly and Bethany discuss their reflections and experiences of attachment and mothering their adult children. Bethany describes changes in how she viewed herself and parenting while her daughter became an adult herself while Kimberly shares her experiences mothering her daughter who is about to move out of their home for the first time. They share challenges, frustrations, and confusing moments around their attachment and parenting, particularly as they age themselves. As most parenting content focuses on the early years, this conversation reveals the nuances of what attachment parenting actually is and how they are navigating its challenges while parenting their grown daughters.

Bio

Bethany Saltman is a literary agent, mother, wife, zen practitioner, and author of “Strange Situation: A Mother’s Journey Into the Science of Attachment.” She has an extensive background in writing, teaching, publishing, and devotes her time as a literary agent helping people put their stories into the world. She is a long-time friend of Kimberly’s and a repeat podcast guest.

What She Shares:

–Different kinds of attachment and the adult attachment test

–Mothering through seasons

–Generational differences of parenting

–Navigating challenges of mothering adult children

What You’ll Hear:

–Different types of attachment

–Securely attached is independent

–Develop through creativity and exploration with secure base

–Flexibility and response with parenting

–Behavior versus attachment

–Parameters for boundaries when discussing children publicly

–Posting children on social media

–Attachment research with adults

–Generational leaps around attachment and development

–Mothering through perimenopause

–Hormonal changes through mothering and phases

–Similarities between toddler and teenage years

–Experiencing the second half of life while mothering

–Values shifting through mothering phases

–Cultural differences around parenting young adults

–Leaving versus staying the nest

–Generational differences of survival wiring

–Frustrations of parenting adults

–Self-actualization leaving parents’ house

–Adult attachment interview protocol

–Mixed feelings shows secure attachment in adulthood

–Importance of rupture and repair instead of only positive

–Spirituality, religion, and parenting

Resources

Website: https://www.bethanysaltman.com/

IG: @bethany_saltman

Class

Sign up for Jagamama Summer School here: https://kimberlyannjohnson.com/jagamama/

Summary

In this episode, Kimberly interviews her favorite podcast guest–her daughter Cece! Cece’s last podcast episode was four years ago, so she shares her reflections around graduating highschool, her college application process, and her experiences as being Kimberly’s daughter. She also turns the mic back to Kimberly to ask Kimberly her own reflections on life’s various stages, single parenting, and what she wants her work to look like after Cece flies the nest.

Bio

Cece, Kimberly's daughter, is a 17 year old high school graduate and vocalist.

What She Shares:

–Cece’s college application process

–Reflections on being Kimberly’s daughter

–Decisions around college and major

–Cece interviews Kimberly

What You’ll Hear:

–Graduating highschool

–How Cece feels being apart of Kimberly’s “brand”

–Why Cece wants to go to college

–Highly academic highschool

–Where Cece will attend college

–Applying to various colleges

–Ranking safety schools, match schools, and reach schools

–Writing college application essays

–Cultural neuroses of applying to colleges

–Kimberly’s experience of college applications

–Reflections on being an only child

–Wanting a sibling

–Being the focus as an only child

–Thoughts on being Kimberly’s daughter

–How Cece feels leaving home

–Excited about moving to Scotland

–Navigating the current political climate

–Kimberly’s reflections about being a maiden

–What Kimberly finds hard about single parenting

–What Kimberly would do differently as a parent

–Kimberly’s favorite part of being Cece’s mom

–How being Cece’s mom informs Kimberly’s work

–Parenting phases that Kimberly misses

–Kimberly’s work as fringe and niche

–How Kimberly views her future work

–What it’s like to be a teenager right now

–How Cece handles having a phone

–Cece’s advice for other parents

–Cece’s music update

–Cece’s offers support for college application process

Resources

Email: cecevieira@protonmail.com

IG: @ceciliajvieira

In this episode, Kimberly switches roles to be in the interviewee seat herself while Elisa asks and reflects about Kimberly’s Mothering the Bones retreats. They just finished one retreat in Wales and reflect on how moving and transformative it was for the gathering to be holding one another. They also discuss the origins of Mothering the Bones–how Kimberly came to this work and why she feels it is the apex of all of her expertise, knowledge, and purpose.

Bio

Elisa Mary Haggarty is an Executive and Conscious Leadership Coach, host of The Soul Podcast, and fellow jaguar. She coaches leaders to become more aware of how they are operating and the impact of how they relate to those around them through Conscious Leadership. She also has a diverse background in somatics and holistics and nutritional wellness. She is based in NYC but serves globally.

What She Shares:

–Mothering the Bones origins

–Nuances of session work in community

–Non-traditional approaches to gathering

–Making space for spontaneous emergence

What You’ll Hear:

–One week out from Mothering the Bones retreat

–Level of intimacy and vulnerability in Kimberly’s work

–Why Kimberly does Mothering the Bones

–Kimberly’s background in body work and nervous systems

–Session work in group

–Elise’s experience at Ghost Ranch

–Lay practitioner defined

–Taking care of people, people of place, and the land

–Range of grief and joy

–Meta-level analysis not needed when sessions occur

–Tactile practice has emerged

–Next step beyond ROLFing and body-work

–Holding the pelvis and witnessing

–Decentralizing role of practitioner

–Importance of witness space as recipient

–Conscientiousness about care and support

–Not all trauma work is intense

–Allow the body to be in blue

–Distributing weight of session with multiple people

–Pairing experts with novices

–Witnessing a freeze

–Repairing with other women’s presence

–Resourced to receive, give, and listen

–Burnout and unsustainability in community work

–Impossibility of birth work and community care in these times

–Value of midwives and second-generation births

–Upcoming book for Mothering the Bones work

–Touch, touching the pelvis non-sexually, sitting, consent

–Bringing whole self to bodywork

–Radical touch

–Listening, presence, story

–Value of artistry in trauma-work

–Non-traditional ways of learning

–Giving space for emerging creativity to come out

–Sexuality and birth require emergence and spontaneity

–Being responsive to group’s needs

–Loosening control in community gatherings

–Art of embodiment

–Opportunities to be spontaneous and surprised

–Tending to place and land of retreats

–Depth and saturation of place

–Different approaches to in-person versus online

–Bodies that need held the most

–Bone holding practice for presence and healing

Resources

Website: https://www.elisamaryhaggarty.com/

IG: @elisamaryhaggarty