How much truth is too much truth? What if you feel ready for disclosure, but your partner doesn't? What’s the actual goal of a therapeutic disclosure—and how do you know when you’re ready?

In this episode, we sit down with Dan Drake, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and expert in betrayal trauma and sex addiction recovery. Dan unpacks the basics of therapeutic disclosure, a structured process where the full truth of sexual betrayal is disclosed in a safe, supported setting. He shares the potential risks and profound benefits of doing disclosure correctly, and clears up common misconceptions, especially among the men preparing to disclose and the women bracing for impact.

Whether you’re just beginning the recovery process or preparing for a formal disclosure, this conversation offers compassionate guidance, clinical insight, and hope for deeper healing on the other side of the truth.

About Our Guest: Dan Drake, LMFT, LPCC, CCPS-S, CSAT-S, is the founder of The Banyan Group, a therapy and coaching practice specializing in betrayal trauma, compulsive sexual behavior, and couples recovery. With over 20 years of clinical experience, Dan is widely respected for his work helping couples rebuild trust through the process of therapeutic disclosure and long-term recovery. Learn more about Dan’s work at www.thebanyangroup.org.

Key Topics Discussed:

• What is therapeutic disclosure, and why does it matter?
• How do you know if you're ready for a disclosure (as the betrayed or the betrayer)?
• What role does the polygraph play in disclosure, and when is it helpful?
• Why disclosure isn't just a one-time confession but a step toward rebuilding trust
• Common misunderstandings men and women bring into the process
• Tips for doing disclosure remotely, safely, and with good aftercare
• A powerful final encouragement from Dan for both spouses on the healing path

Connect with Us:

🌐 www.watermarkcoach.com🎙️ Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast📸 Instagram: @watermarkcoaching🔍 Looking for a trained guide to walk you through disclosure? Visit Kintsugi Recovery Partners and explore the Find a Guide section for professionals trained in Dan and Dr. Janice Caudill’s disclosure process.

Sponsored by Pure Life Alliance

This week on The Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast, we’re joined by Amy Elysse—vocal coach, faith-filled encourager, and a radiant light in her community. Amy opens up about her own betrayal story and shares how the human voice, primarily through singing, can become a powerful tool for healing. Whether you’re musically inclined or simply longing to express yourself more fully, Amy brings warmth, insight, and practical wisdom to the conversation. And she's created a free recording to guide you through a healing exercise.

As a mom and coach, Amy helps women reclaim their voices and step into confidence through song and self-expression. She reminds us that healing doesn’t have to be heavy; it can be joyful, playful, and freeing.

Key Takeaways from the Episode:

• How Amy’s betrayal story shaped her understanding of healing
• Why the voice is such a powerful vehicle for recovery
• Parallels between singing and the process of emotional healing
• What it really means to “find your voice” after betrayal
• Easy, fun ways to bring music and singing into your daily healing practices
• Encouragement for anyone on the journey of rebuilding

Connect with Amy: Follow Amy on Instagram at @tunedintograce

Connect with Us: Visit our website: Watermark Coach Follow us on Instagram: @WatermarkCoaching

Thank you for listening! Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review our podcast to stay updated on future episodes and help others find the hope and support they deserve.

Produced and edited by Kris Rocha & Cory Gonzalez.

Sponsored by Pure Life Alliance

Pornography addiction is one of the most misunderstood struggles in the church today, often shrouded in shame and secrecy. Sam Black, Director of Recovery Education at Covenant Eyes and author of The Healing Church: What Churches Get Wrong About Pornography and How to Fix It, joins us to share how real freedom comes through accountability, grace, and informed support. Drawing from his journalism background and over 70 interviews with pastors, counselors, and people in recovery, Sam offers practical wisdom for churches, couples, and individuals navigating the path to healing.

Key Takeaways:

1. How Covenant Eyes Works – Sam explains how the software uses screen accountability and ally relationships to help individuals break free from pornography.
2. What Makes Accountability Effective – Data shows accountability is most potent when allies are engaged, supportive, and focused on deeper heart change—not just behavior monitoring.
3. Support for Spouses—Sam offers compassionate advice for wives who hope software will cure them, emphasizing that while it's a helpful tool, healing requires a broader process of trust-building and recovery.
4. What Churches Get Wrong – Drawing from The Healing Church, Sam reveals common missteps ministry leaders make—like placing blame on spouses or assuming more sex will “fix” the problem—and how to shift toward grace-filled support.
5. The Power of Collaboration: Sam shares why he invited Dr. Sheri Keffer to author a chapter in his book, emphasizing the importance of including voices from the betrayal trauma community in the healing process.

Resources Mentioned:

• Covenant Eyes
• The Healing Church by Sam Black
• Allied: Fighting Porn with Accountability, Faith, and Friends – Free eBook

Connect with Sam Black:

• LinkedIn
• Read Sam’s Articles at Covenant Eyes

Connect with Us!

👉 Watermark Coaching

👉 Follow us on Instagram: @WatermarkCoaching

🌟 Thank you for listening! Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast. Your feedback helps us grow and ensures more people can find the hope and support they deserve.

This podcast is sponsored by and produced with the support of Pure Life Alliance.

Dr. Anthony Walker joins us to share how he helps men navigate the healing process after betrayal. He provides insights from Help Her Heal, a workbook by Carol Jergensen Sheets, and discusses how men can develop emotional attunement, overcome resistance, and strengthen their relationships.

Key Talking Points:

• What led Dr. Anthony Walker to Help Her Heal and how he incorporates its strategies in his coaching.
• The importance of emotional attunement in repairing relational trust and how men can develop this skill.
• Common misconceptions men have about betrayal trauma and how Help Her Heal addresses them.
• How men can work through shame and defensiveness to focus on healing both themselves and their relationships.
• The role of spiritual warfare in marriage and how couples can recognize and combat these challenges.
• Encouragement for men who are resistant to engaging in the healing process and practical steps to begin.

Resources Mentioned:

• Help Her Heal by Carol Jergensen Sheets – Amazon Link
• Learn more about Dr. Anthony Walker at www.coachanthonywalker.com
• Intensive Hope Coaching – www.intensivehope.com/pages/services/coaching.html

Connect with Us!

👉 Watermark Coaching

👉 Follow us on Instagram: @WatermarkCoaching

🌟 Thank you for listening! Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast. Your feedback helps us grow and ensures more people can find the hope and support they deserve.

This podcast is sponsored by and produced with the support of Pure Life Alliance.

In this episode, we welcome Hope Ray, a Licensed Professional Counselor who coined Betrayal Violence. Hope is a leader in the field of betrayal trauma, offering deep insights into the effects of secrecy, deception, and relational power imbalances. She is also the creator of Complex Partner Trauma magazine, available on Amazon, which provides resources and support for betrayed partners.

Throughout our conversation, we dive into Reality Collapse, the disorientation that betrayed partners experience, and explore how betrayal violence impacts healing and recovery. Hope shares her expertise on recognizing and navigating these complex emotional experiences, helping listeners regain clarity and reclaim their sense of reality.

Key Takeaways from the Episode:

🔹 Understanding Reality Collapse – Hope explains what Reality Collapse is, why it occurs, and how often a betrayed partner might experience it.

🔹 Identifying Reality Collapse – We discuss the key signs that indicate someone is experiencing a Reality Collapse and how it can distort their perception of past and present experiences.

🔹 Betrayal Violence and Its Effects – Hope unpacks how betrayal violence exacerbates trauma and why it’s essential to recognize its impact.

🔹 Endangerment in Betrayal Trauma – What does endangerment mean in the context of betrayal trauma? Hope explains how betrayed partners can assess and safeguard their emotional and physical well-being.

🔹 Processing Betrayal and Reality Collapse – Hope shares how Reality Collapse affects a betrayed partner's ability to process their experiences and the symptoms that indicate they may be struggling.

🔹 Steps Toward Healing and Reclaiming Reality – Practical strategies for those who have experienced Reality Collapse, including steps to rebuild trust in themselves and their perceptions.

Connect with Us:

👉 Website: hoperay.com

👉 Watermark Coaching

👉 Follow us on Instagram: @WatermarkCoaching

🌟 Thank you for listening! Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast. Your feedback helps us grow and ensures more people can find the hope and support they deserve.

This podcast is sponsored by and produced with the support of Pure Life Alliance.

We had the privilege of sitting down with Matthew and Joanna Raabsmith to discuss the transformative power of the Intimacy Pyramid. With their personal story of betrayal, addiction, and healing as the backdrop, the Raabsmiths shared actionable insights and hope for couples looking to rebuild trust, connection, and relational intimacy.

The Raabsmiths are passionate leaders in the field of marriage and relationship restoration. Combining their expertise with their lived experience, they empower couples to overcome the challenges of betrayal and relational trauma. As creators of the Intimacy Pyramid, they provide a structured and compassionate approach to help couples rediscover trust, deepen connection, and cultivate true intimacy. Learn more about their groundbreaking work at https://intimacypyramid.com/.

Key Takeaways from the Episode:

• How They Got Started: Matthew and Joanna share their journey into this field, driven by a deep desire to support couples in navigating the complexities of betrayal and healing.
• Joy in the Work: They reveal the most rewarding aspects of working with couples, including witnessing the transformation and renewed hope in relationships.
• Challenges in the Healing Process: The Raabsmiths identify key hurdles couples face, emphasizing the importance of patience, vulnerability, and perseverance.
• The Intimacy Pyramid: This is an amazing tool for guiding couples step-by-step toward thriving intimacy, fostering trust, safety, and mutual understanding.
• Keys to Success for Both Partners: Insights into what the betraying spouse, the betrayed partner, and the couple as a whole can do to move forward successfully.
• Personal Story: Matthew and Joanna’s candid sharing of their own struggles and triumphs offers hope and relatability for listeners.

Connect with Us:

👉 Visit Matthew and Joanna Raabsmith’s website

👉 Free Resource from the Raabsmiths!

👉 Watermark Coaching

👉 Follow us on Instagram: @WatermarkCoaching

🌟 Thank you for listening! Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast. Your feedback helps us grow and ensures more people can find the hope and support they deserve.

This podcast is sponsored by and produced with the support of Pure Life Alliance.

We’re excited to welcome Dr. Laura Sanger back to The Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast! Dr. Sanger’s first episode remains the top fan favorite, and we are thrilled to have her return with another timely and profound message—this time focusing on rest, just in time for the holiday season.

Dr. Sanger is a clinical psychologist, author, and the founder of No Longer Enslaved (www.nolongerenslaved.com), where she equips individuals to live free in their God-given identity, authority, and purpose.

In this episode, we explore:

🌟 What is the importance of entering into Sabbath Rest? Dr. Sanger shares how Sabbath rest is more than physical; it’s a spiritual posture of trust and renewal.

🌟 What are the redemptive gifts of Romans 12? We dive into the unique ways God has wired us to bring His light into the world.

🌟 What does it mean to walk in dominion authority? Learn what it looks like to walk confidently in the birthright authority Christ has given us.

This discussion is packed with insight, encouragement, and practical applications for embracing rest, stepping into your gifts, and walking in victory.

Why this episode matters: As we approach Christmas, the message of entering into God’s rest couldn’t be more relevant. Whether navigating life’s busyness, recovering from betrayal, or simply seeking a deeper relationship with God, this episode will inspire and equip you.

Connect with Us:

👉 No Longer Enslaved

👉 Watermark Coaching

👉 Follow us on Instagram: @WatermarkCoaching

🌟 Thank you for listening! Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Betrayal Recovery Transformation Podcast. Your feedback helps us grow and ensures more people can find the hope and support they deserve.

This podcast is proudly sponsored by and produced with the support of Pure Life Alliance.

On today's episode of The BRT Podcast, we welcome the amazing Stacey Smith. She’s the Chief Clinical Officer and a Clinical Therapist at Daring Ventures. With a personal recovery journey from betrayal and "stinkin' thinkin'," Stacey uses her lived experience and professional expertise to guide betrayed partners and those suffering from addiction toward healing. She is certified in EMDR therapy and specializes in helping people overcome attachment wounds and shame. Stacey is passionate about creating a healing partnership with her clients and believes in the transformative power of therapy.

Key Highlights:

Stacey shares the acronym "Empower" to teach us about Post Betrayal Growth.

E - Embrace Change

M - Movement

P -Positive Mentality/Mindset

O - Own Your Life

W- Welcome Power

E - Elect a Choice

R - Resolve to Choose

Connect with Us:

• Stacey Smith
• Watermark Coach
• Healing with the Howies
• Follow us on Instagram: @WatermarkCoaching

Thank you for listening! Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review our podcast to stay updated on future episodes and help others find the help and support they deserve. 🌟

This podcast is sponsored by and produced with the support of www.purelifealliance.com